Geezers & Geysers

Have you ever felt old?

I’m not talking about the moment that mystery pain shoots through your knee or you get a stab of pain in the back. I’m talking about ‘high school reunion’ type old. Like when you see that old friend who was as hot as an iron in her day. She was so hot all the boys wanted her to press their pants.

That moment happened to me last night. And it was funny.

I won tickets to see one of my favorite bands, Train, in a raffle at work. They are touring with REO Speedwagon. I like REO songs, so I was also excited to see them in concert.

My first indication that this event was not like others I have attended happened when we drove into the venue and there was no traffic. Granted, we were an hour late. (Too busy arguing about the general safety of going to a venue situated in a flood plain during a flash flood.) My general experience with concerts is Traffic with a capital “T”. One generally sits in line going in and then sits in line going out.  So sincere is my abhorrence of traffic that my love of the band must outweigh my negative feelings about crowds. I was completely kerfuffled by the lack of delay in driving and parking. We zipped in with nary a brake light in sight.

The second indication of a different concert experience was the population of people at the concert. I was there about 60 seconds when I started to notice the abundance of beer bellies and boob jobs. The salt-and-pepper {hair do’s} had nothing to do with another fixture of my adolescence, the band, Salt N Peppa, of “Push It” fame. I looked around me and I could almost smell the collagen. As soon as we found our seats I whispered to my husband, “Geez, this concert is filled with old people.”

They were everywhere. And they were weird. I sat uncomfortably for a moment until the host of our suite introduced himself. He too was old. I introduced my husband and then started answering general questions. “How long have you worked for the company? How many children do you have?” And before I even thought about my children and their ages I said, “My granddaughter is 4.” And it hit me, “Oh geez. I’m old too!”

When REO Speedwagon began to play, I observed their weathered faces juxtaposed against their “hip and happening” outfits. (Not hip as in “he needs a hip replacement”, though that might be the case.) That’s bizarre, I thought. They look cool. But did I really think they would be dressed like my dad and grandpa? They are rock stars, after all. The lead singer certainly was lively and engaging so I tried not to think too much about how old he was. I’m certain he sings better than me and I’m 22 years younger. I learned via the internet that Kevin Cronin joined the band 2 years before I was even born. I’m sure he’s entitled to wear whatever the H-E-double hockey-sticks he wants.

And with the last sentence I realize my vernacular puts me squarely in the land of the aged. But I’m not ashamed to admit watching old people act teenagers is quite amusing. I highly recommend it.

And then Train hit the stage!

I fell in love with Train some time back when I heard the song, “Calling All Angels”. The lyrics are so filled with hope: “I won’t give up if you don’t give up”. I don’t know how many times I’ve replayed that song in my car while driving around in a state of depression with eyes full of tears. They inspire me to cling to hope with bloody fists. But they have a lot of great songs. I especially like the catchy, “Hey Soul Sister” with the spunky ukulele. I am just enamored with Pat Monahan’s talent in song writing and singing. In my opinion, the band, Train, are the bees’ knees.

Of course, Pat Monahan is five years older than me so that makes him a geezer too. But he is also a geyser. Let me explain. The force with which Monahan erupted onstage was momentous. He is a rock star in every sense of the word. He has charisma, energy, passion and is playfully engaged with the audience during every segment of the concert. He sang skillfully while concert goers threw their phones onstage for him to take selfie’s. He did this effortlessly. He didn’t miss a single lyric. He was full of vigor and stamina. I should probably stop there because I’m embarrassing myself. 

Geysers are one of nature’s most wonder-filled gifts to humanity. People travel from all over the world to experience them. They are beautiful and whimsical. They inspire wonder and gratitude. That is how I felt about my experience at the concert. I was grateful to experience a thing of whimsy, grace and good fun. And while I express a lot of praise for Pat Monahan, let’s be clear that he has a huge team of people making him look and sound good on stage. The lights, smoke machines and technicians were all on point and should be commended for a job well done. Train really is an engine firing on all cylinders.

In conclusion, I have come to terms with my geezer-ness. I own it. I celebrate it. But I will also share that at the end of the night I was able to jog out of the venue faster than many of my fellow concert goers. And frankly, that felt great! Living a healthy lifestyle certainly has it perks. Because I may be a geezer, but I can geyser with the best of them.