Archive for the The Journey Category

“So I hated life, because what is done under the sun was grievous to me, for all is vanity and a striving after wind.” Ecclesiastes 2:17

The holidays hit hard for some of us. Even as we see the Christmas lights go up on houses and we consume ads and movies that tell us to “believe in the magic of Christmas”, something thrums in our heart in a disharmonious way. We want to believe there is hope and joy (and a really cool present under the tree for us), but we struggle with the redux of spending money we don’t have and longing for things we can’t buy.

I have a squishy spot for sentimental movies, and I have been (over)indulging as of late. Last night I watched “The Spirit of Christmas”. While my husband made fun of the spirit (a ghost who is corporeal for 12 days a year), I settled in to see how Kate, a woman who has never been in love, would eradicate him from the inn he “possessed” so she could sell it and get promoted. Convoluted much? Yes, but it tickled all my squishy places so quit picking on me!

Most movies  like this present Christmas Day as the “happy ever after” moment. In fact, there was a moment in this flick that hinted we might not get one, and the heroine would have to wait until the next (or even the next!) Christmas to solve the mystery. I’m glad that didn’t happen because it would have been very tedious. The lingering question I had after credits rolled was, “What happens the day AFTER Christmas?”

Back in the real world, I had to get up for work this morning. My son was sick and couldn’t go to school today. After solving that situation, I hopped in my car and started to drive to work. I thought of my friend whose husband is battling a mysterious disease, another friend who lost her best childhood friend to Covid, and another friend whose work situation is dehumanizing at best. I thought of my own workload and insecurities around not performing well and started to feel down. Because while all of these difficult situations swirl around me, there are Christmas lights twinkling and music playing. And I want to slap Bing Crosby. (Too bad he’s already dead.)

While driving, I began to think, “what so special about Christmas anyway?” Is it the presents? Not really. Not as an adult. The last really awesome gift I got that made an impact on my psyche was the guinea pig under the tree in the early 80’s (back when I still believed in Santa Claus). Or was it the unicorn my mother hand-made in the late 80’s? It sure wasn’t the Cabbage patch doll my grandmother made for me when I was 11 (what girl wanted a homemade knock off instead of the real thing?) Although I have to admit, I wish I still had it now that she’s gone. In fact, all of those things are gone. Ash. Dust. Fodder for landfills. One could say the magic of Christmas past is… dead.

Ecclesiastes uses the word “vanity” instead of “meaningless”. In chapter two the preacher discusses the vanity of pleasure and of wisdom. No matter how beautiful and wonderful pleasures of all varieties are, they are meaningless. Everything dies and turns to dust. No matter how wise or foolish people are, they all die.

“I hated all my toil in which I toil under the sun, seeing that I must leave it to the man who will come after me, and who knows whether he will be wise or a fool? Yet he will be master of all for which I toiled and used my wisdom under the sun. This also is vanity.” Ecclesiastes 2:18-19

Wouldn’t that be an interesting Christmas card? “Merry Christmas, Worm Food.”

How about, “Congratulations on your nuptials, here’s the receipt in case you get divorced.”

Or better yet, “Blessings on your pending adoption, hope the baby doesn’t get repossessed!” (This actually happened to a friend of mine.)

But let’s sing a happy holiday song, “While the merry bells are ringing, happy holidays to you!”

Somebody poke that guy in the eye already!

Now maybe the dear reader thinks I’ve turned “jolly green Grinch”, but that’s certainly not true. Why else would I be binge-watching Hallmark Channel movies? I want to “recapture the wonder” of my childhood Christmases, but the more I think about it, the more I realize the “holiday spirit” is just nostalgia repackaged and offered up for sale. We are trying to buy and sell a feeling. And I’ll be very candid here: it’s all just a very expensive lie.

Oh boy! Now she went and did it. Margaret spilled curdled milk all over the Christmas tablecloth. Send her to the woodshed for 10 lashings. Better yet, lock the door and throw away the key. No fruit cake for her!

So, since I’ve been consigned to the woodshed, I’ll digress a little bit… This is exactly why I love the bible. It cuts through the crap. So many people think it’s full of mystical mumbo jumbo, but it’s not. It really is the greatest story every told. We have so perverted the Christmas story with our cultural traditions that people are willing to throw it on the rubbish heap. But for those who are hurting—who are suffering—who are aching for there to be more—they will find hope in its pages. And the hope is this: there is a creator who sees our broken hearts. He was sitting in the throne room of heaven and said, “how can I save them? Who can I send?” and Jesus said, “Here I am. Send me. I’ll bind up their broken hearts and shine light into all of their dark places. I will bring justice and mercy. And love. I will show them what true love really is.”

Andrew Peterson captured the hope and joy of that love in his song, “High Noon”.

“Jesus took in that breath and shattered all death with his life.”

For those of us who grew up in the church and have heard the story a million times, we would do well to stop and consider: Jesus was dead and then he took a breath and was alive. Only God can do that! And without that truth, the Christian story is…at best…hollowed-out, disingenuous, and fake. It’s no better than the story of a fat old man climbing down chimneys to provide toys and treats—which most of the world knows is a big old lie – especially those children with hollowed-out bellies and no food to fill them. Or worse, mothers and wives whose arms are empty.

Without Jesus, Christmas is just nostalgia which quickly sours—like expired milk—on December 26^th.

There are those who will say the bible is full of fables. But the majority of people have never read it to assess for themselves whether or not it is true. And while I enjoy movies that tickle my squishy places (and make my husband crazy!) I love truth. Once one is awake to the truth, it’s hard to get caught up in the fantasy and make-believe world of the holidays. My whole life doesn’t hinge on that perfect gift, or providing the perfect experience for my children or grand children. I might make a nice dinner and express my love for my friends and neighbors, but I’m not going to freak out if the cookies get burned or they sell out of power rangers (now I’m really dating myself!).

So instead of getting down about the sad situations, I’m going to practice gratitude for the many many blessings God has given to me regardless of how tempted I am to complain about long lines and cranky customer service representatives. But most importantly, I’m going to tell my friends about Jesus, the founder and perfecter of my faith, who for the joy that was set before him, endured the cross, despising its shame, and is seated at the right hand of the Father. (Hebrews 12) He has conquered the grave! He is alive!

I love the words of the preacher in Ecclesiastes because they remind me of the toil and hardship of life under the sun. The pain is real. Then, they draw my eyes to what is above the sun – namely God the Father – and the promises of life after death if I believe in His son.

May this Christmas draw your heart to everything that is good and lovely and pure and TRUE.

“I’m takin’ what they’re givin’ ’cause I’m workin’ for livin'” – Huey Lewis & The News

Have you ever looked up from your day job and thought, “What the heck am I doing here?” Maybe your boss claimed your work as your own or your co-worker called in sick (again!) and you’re stuck covering his shift. Or maybe you work with someone who takes themselves way too seriously and has a nasty habit of tattling all your foibles to your boss for no other reason than to make them look better. I’ve been there (and I have the t-shirt!).

I remember the good old days – when I was a teenager – when I enjoyed going to work. I had fun running the salad bar at Rax Restaurant. I steamed the broccoli and added hot water to the cheese powder to make melted cheese. In between tasks I cracked jokes with my co-workers, and after we closed at night, we turned on the big boom box and jammed while we cleaned. I remember being tired, and smelling bad, but feeling really great about “working for a living.”

Then, I had to get a real job so I could provide for myself and I ended up working for trolls. These nasty fellows refused to stay under their drawbridge and carried a big stick–with which they would thump me over the head when the mood suited them. And since I was dependent on the paycheck I learned how to “take what they were giving.”

A means to an end

I remember when I had hope in the business world. I went to work with a dream of being promoted and believed what my superiors told me; namely, that if I worked hard and did a good job, I would earn respect and get promoted. But after years of disappointment, I kind of gave up. No offense, but some people just never “make it”. They get stuck in a position – kind of like an actor who’s been type-cast – and are perpetually shoehorned until they retire. This is especially true for administrative professionals (secretaries) like me. I learned to accept my lot in life by practicing gratitude for what I have, but it doesn’t erase the sense of injustice I feel at being passed over for positions for which I was more than capable of performing.

Over the years I have come to know others who face injustice in the workplace. They have bosses who discriminate or co-workers who harass. They tolerate the workplace because they have to – or they quit and find a new position elsewhere. Everyone has a means of coping with having to work for a living.

Living the dream

I recently watched an MTV Behind the Music biography of Huey Lewis from the band of the same name. If you don’t know his story, it’s worth watching. He was going to college to be an engineer and discovered a love of music. He started a band and struggled to get signed for 10 years. The band (one you’ve never heard of) made a record that flopped and they broke up. So he started his own band and found wild success very quickly. His whole life was making music.  He loved it! He was good at it! And then one day he woke up and found he had lost hearing in one ear. Then, in 2018 he lost hearing in the other. His life, as he knew it, was over. He would never write music or perform again.

It’s hard to describe his countenance as he discussed not being able to sing or perform any longer. He looked…lost. Sure, he mentioned that he felt bad for putting the people who depended on him out of work (he mentioned they all had pension plans so they weren’t destitute). But what struck me most of all is that he loved what he did and was genuinely lost without his preferred profession. He missed touring with “his buddies” and the general comradery of pal-ing around with fans after concerts. How different his job experience was from mine.

“Then I saw that all toil and all skill in work come from a man’s envy of his neighbor. This also is vanity and a striving after wind. Better is a handful of quietness than two hands full of toil and a striving after wind.” – Ecclesiastes 4:4,6

I work for a wealth management company and many of my co-workers really do enjoy their work. They love “building wealth” and “serving clients”. But many others work because they have to. Of course, I see the subtle envies all around me and shudder. People really are trying to “keep up with the Joneses”. In small ways, I see the fashion trends of women who want to be “in style” though this is not limited to women–the men do it too. I see the leaders purchasing home in specific localities because those are the “hip places to live” and buying vehicles because So-and-So has one. Meanwhile, I’m trying to navigate a landscape where I want to avoid being fired because I’ll be destitute without my job. It’s all so…wearisome. Which is why I love the book of Ecclesiastes. The writer makes clear that so much of life is vanity, a chasing after the wind.

Inevitabilities

It’s easy to look at rock stars, celebrities and white collar workers with envy because they seem to have what we want. We assume if we had what they have, we would be happier than what we now are. To illustrate this to each other we say (or sing) things like, “Money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy me a boat.”

But I see plenty of people who have nice boats who aren’t happy. So that idiom is blatantly false.

“What gain has the worker from his toil? I have seen the business that God has given to the children of man to be busy with. He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also, he has put eternity into man’s heart, yet so that he cannot find out what God has done from the beginning to the end. I perceived that there is nothing better for them than to be joyful and to do good as long as they live; also that everyone should eat and drink and take pleasure in all his toil–this is God’s gift to man.” – Ecclesiastes 3:9-13

A good friend of mine takes this proverb very seriously. I met her at work years ago and we became fast friends. She had a good-paying job but she did not find pleasure in it. So she quit. She spent a year studying and training to do the work she truly wanted to do and then found a job doing it. She has had several jobs since then. Because she knows life is short–and she has to work for a living–she wants to enjoy what she does. If she doesn’t, she moves on. She is very brave (and beautiful to boot!).

Like the “preacher” of Ecclesiastes, she knows we all grow old and die. All of our work and toil will pass away with us, but what will we have to show for it? Some of us may get a plaque or a really nice obituary in the Wall Street Journal. Some of us may even make enough money to fund a college scholarship or, like John Bon Jovi, start a free restaurant for people who can’t afford food. That’s all very good, but we’ll still be dead. And the dead don’t enjoy the fruits of their labor.

“As you do not know the way the spirit comes to the bones in the womb of a woman with child, so you do not know the work of God who makes everything.” – Ecclesiastes 11:5

We have one life to live and it is best lived one day at a time. We should enjoy it to the best of our ability for we know there will be dark and dreary days too. Also, we never know which day will be our last so we should number our days and make them count for something.

The power of love!

Today, a co-worker reached out to me because we are working on a project together. She was worried that I am being taken advantage of. What she didn’t know was that I volunteered to work on the project and am really excited for the opportunity. But I’ve been thinking ever since about what it means to “work for a living” but still make a difference in the workplace. My friend wanted to protect me from harm and was willing to speak up to those in leadership on my behalf. It made me wonder if everyone would hate work as much as they do if all of their co-workers did the same.

Today, if you are “working for a living” and hating every minute of it, maybe you could be like her. Start a chain reaction. Take care of someone else and tell them to do the same. I believe we really can make the world a better place by loving our neighbor as ourselves. Jesus started a pretty cool trend.